on Writers block (sorta)

I can put up a number of reasons right now, the largest being Chapter 22/23 - as in distilling choice tidbits out of seven volumes plus is going to be no picnic and I feel like I need a sabbatical to do it, which doesn't exist. At least until Christmas. (Seriously, who would have thought the more difficult sections would be the ones you'd already written about, as in it becomes an obstacle while being integral?) The problem with the remaining third of the book is that it has all been written about before (well nearly all of it). And it all needs to be changed.

But the largest block right now has been the subject of the remaining leg; it's how no one would feel the least bit inclined to describe the intricate details of a grand conjunction happening at a distance when one feels the ultimate outcome was simply having one's heart thrown under a bus.

(yes @Billy, I'm referring to you)

So it is interesting having assessed this to be the block and having made an initial forge forward to right where it begins, to have said subject unleash the preambles of this new upcoming album, "Oceania", in pre-tour of sorts. In which he revisits the songs you mentioned years and years ago as having provided the touchstones that led to this encounter in the first place ("Pissant", "Frail and Bedazzled", "Thru the Eyes of Ruby", accumulating next to all those that have been introduced to the set since 2007 ("Set the Ray to Jerry", "Transformer" "My Blue Heaven", "Galapagos", those sorts)).

Having drifted away and viewing the next outcome with some trepidation (how encompassing would betrayal be; the future was not viewed with optimism), it has been a pleasant surprise to take the time to decipher these new lyrics. This wasn't what I was expecting; I thought "Oceania" would be a deliberate digression of sorts, a statement of artistic independence and newer loves and dreams.

I've ended up being in a very small minority the delay in release might actually benefit, but I've still so much work to do, with very little time free to do it in.

At any rate, spoken on the level of how it actually feels, the heart under the bus has been reduced in its proportions to where it should be (a vanishing point), because what exists here in spiritual common identity has always been so much more, is so actually groundbreaking, and means far more than the identity to be found in two hearts. It gives me the impetus to go forward, and imparts the enthusiasm of having something still that must be met (on time). It is more satisfying than the coinciding of beginning the Achtung Baby section (which was the beginning) just when that 20 year reissue promotion brought it to the fore and the songs were brought out for air right after the subject was explored for the first time. This is more satisfying because it involves the future/present, not just the past.

Suffice to say that every one of these songs possesses elements already written, alluded to in the book. "Panopticon" is its central concept, one introduced to Billy as far back as 11 years ago. I don't feel an impetus to list all the details, the book will answer all as a seamless whole. Why just the mention of the Holy Ghost and YHWH in one song would be highly significant is only thrown into relief by the sum context, his first revelation, our first introduction.

We're running out of present tense, indeed.

The future holds anticipation in this aspect, and for that, @Billy, I thank you; I didn't expect it from you. Help for the final journey. I want to be ready. If these are your first five, the rest holds the potential of great promise and in the moment that is very exciting. (Note "Quasar" and "Stella P" are actually two names for the same track.)

We still stand at a draw. I do not trust you. This just means denial in the future could cut that much deeper. I entreat just one thing, do not deny; that is all you have to do. But the first step taken is something to be very grateful for. It's even what I [inadvertently, did I have the wrong object?] asked for as the "end game". Well, two would be better than one. We'll see.

On an unrelated note: to the [very small] minority of people who view this, apart from the new release music related posts, every post is hyper-linked into the book, which would be best served by being published in pdf format, though that has a serious downside. It is potentially the first book that would be integrated with a website as well as its hyperlinked web references (which are primarily music). The narrative will stand on its own, yet each link is essential to the big picture. They make no sense in and of themselves, but serve the narrative as a whole, like footnotes. They are the original events, dreams, performances, videos and journal transcripts from which the narrative derived, and logging the personally written ones is a means of culling them so they can be reproduced on their own independent site, dedicated to the book. That is the intent, anyway. They do not actually quote the book. They serve it. When dated, you have the timeline of the book where it stands, as they are incorporated when the book arrives at that point, where the writing is in real time.

"Panopticon" lyrics from Smashing Pumpkins' "Oceania"

Rise
Love is here
Don't make me wonder
Lights never clear
Trace those wounds
Use the views
To build don’t prove
Don't make me suffer
Birds from the wind, [and will]

Rest in the chains of desire
Run thru the veins of tonight
Stroll across the years [.... of] your life

There’s a sun that shines in
There’s a world that stares out of me
[Out of me/out of the breeze], to [thee -it just sounds like it, really!]

Wake, love is here
Don't make me suffer
[To dash debonair]
[Trace those wounds]
[Use the pain, hide those blame]
Don't make me wonder
To ask what we have [in you]
You, where are you?
Where are you?
Where are you?

There’s a sun that shines in

There’s a world that stares out of me
All out of you, it’s real
There’s a sun that shines in
There’s a world that stares out of me
All out of you
And all out of you
It’s there

There’s a sun that shines [in you]
There’s a sun that shines
There’s a sun that shines [in you]

So, for those unfamiliar with how I do things: block parenthesis mean the lyrics are in question; the rest is readily understood, a word missing. You will note the gist of the song fits with the definition of the structure that is the title word, but in a positive way. And time will tell my aptitude for this realm of speculation, as any search will show that no one really has a handle on these lyrics. Yea, I hope they publish them, they're great. But I'm not making any bets, not sure 'e has the balls.

Oh and it's delightful!

The song is here.

Smashing Pumpkins "Oceania" - "Quasar"

girl, ride on.
krishna, ride on.
Ma, ride on.

yod he vau!
let's ride on! 3xs

faith you are
Holy Ghost
you know
know my blood
do I know you?
what keeps us free
if you believe
please allow me to say hello to you

yes i understand
yes i know my way/will
yes i am a man
yes i, yes i

lover, lover, catch me slow
you can't [sell] me, know this
you can't have my side
lover lover stay with me alive

yod he vau!
brothers, sisters, roll!
salam, ride on.

yod he vau!
let’s ride on! 3xs

yes i understand
yes i know my way
yes i am one man
yes i

yes i understand
yes i know my way
yes i am one man

yes i, yes i

YOD HE VAU HE!
YOD HE VAU HE!
YOD HE VAU HE!

Song is Here.

Oceania lyrics Smashing Pumpkins cont. "Pale Horse", "Oceania"

Pale Horse

if i was to listen
i'd turn back
give up all my reasons
forgive up the past

you think i'd swallow that
bear away the ceilings
just to stop and ask

of fluorescein
fluorescein
fluorescein
thorazine

they give you this
they take away that
thorazine

there will be no rallies
there will be no long lost friends
empty all the insides
empty of the last pretends
you stand by your feeling of an end

so many lives/lights
runaway life
so many lights

when they locked you up
they shut me out
and gave me the keys so i could show you ‘round
but we were not allowed
omens of a daydream, a cottage you’re bound
by thorazine
fluorescein
fluorescein
thorazine
they give you this
they take away that
fluorescein

there will be no rallies
there will be no long lost friends
caught in/on the spotlight
running out of present tense -ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. No one will get that until the book. (Or this blog.)
fixed on a feeling of an end

so many lights
runaway

please come back
please come back
please come back, pale horse
please come back
please come back
please come back, pale horse

please come back please come back
please come back, pale horse

please come back
please come back
please come back, pale horse

After all the craic I told you about the neon black light world/level/floor of the Tripping House, "Flourescein" is a smile. Especially since you produced the black light tinged affair for "GLOW" after being told about it...

Oceania

No one can love you
'Cause no one can free you
Lovers can't touch you
'Cause lovers might reach you, yeah

I'm so alone, so alone
but better than a wretched world
better than a broken pearl
I'm so alone, so alone
but better than I ever was
better than a just laid cause

Night may keep you sworn
May bring you stones
Just to touch
The journey's rest
The warning circumstance
The dreams I had
The dreams I had
and still she’s gone
and still she’s gone

Life may keep the best
[Vocation] best
The dreams I had
The dreams I had

Oh, would I follow you
How could I have ever doubted you
sweet baby, nurture me
sweet lady, if you please
try to wait on me
try to [weigh] on me
try to wait on me
just try to wait on me

try to wait
walk the cliffs of your rock nation
find the fate of me
my mistake
as the last remaining soldier
wars take the place of you

lover wait
lover wait in love
try to wait
cast off your indecision
face to face
we breathe

try to wait
cast off your indecision
face to face
we breathe

Smashing Pumpkins' "Pinwheels" Lyrics -'Tis a beautiful thing

Mother Moon
Mistress of the Sun
Say, I got you, I got you
Sister Sun
Lovers of the tune
Sing, I got you, I got you, I got you

Floating away, I think I'll stay
[As the view]
Floating away, I think I'll stay in blue light
Floating away, I think I'll stay
Next to you
Finding a way to make the loss in you
Cuz you don't deserve me
I know, that I deserve you

Mother Moon
Mistress of the Sun, Say,
I got you, I got you
Sister Sun
Lovers of the tune, Sing
I got you, I got you
Mother Moon
Mistress of the Sun, Sing
I got you, I got you
Oh I got you
Oh I got you
Mother Moon

Floating away, I think I'll stay
[as the fuse]
Floating away, I think a day with you
Floating away, I think I'll stay
Next to you
Finding a way to make the loss in you
Cuz you don't deserve me
But I deserve you
Flowers for the May Queen
But life for the prayers
If nobody wears
And what is loss, if I've got you

Thanks the SP Forum for all the work they did on all the lyrics.
Song is here.